S2. E18. Romans 14 (part 5)
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[00:00:00] if we get so zoomed in where now we're condemning each other and kind of have this infighting about what to eat and what not to eat, no. That God's already worked it out and God's going to speak to people personally. And it is not your job to correct people. It's not your job to be right. It's not your job to eat the cleanest and think that you're holier than thou.
Hello. Hello. Welcome back to Your Daily Bread podcast. This is the [00:01:00] fifth and final part of our Romans 14 study. Y'all, I have absolutely loved studying the scripture with you. There is so much in here, even more than what we can say on the show. So I hope that the Lord has been ministering to you through this and helping you to see how this applies to your life and your relationship with food, the people in your circle.
and everything and just how to live and how to walk out the food freedom that Christ died for. And so I'm really excited to close out with this last message that the Lord wants us to live in harmony and to eat in a way that builds each other up. And like one Corinthians 10 31 says, to eat and drink in a way that gives God all the glory, all the honor and recognition.
And we know that we are living Christlike by our fruit, by our peace, by our patience, by our joy and love. Yes, [00:02:00] self-control and also gentleness and kindness. So I'll pray us in. Father God, thank you for this day. Lord, we just praise you for the breath in our lungs and another day in these bodies that you have given us that steward.
Lord, thank you for guiding us. Through this series and thank you for scripture that is just so specific, Lord, on how you want us to navigate the world in terms of our relationship with food and relating to each other, knowing that we are all going to have different needs for our health and for our bodies and different convictions.
Lord, I pray that every listener continues to grow in their partnership with you. Holy Spirit. So that we can be sensitive to the nudges and how you're leading us to steward our bodies. And Lord, I pray that [00:03:00] your word just continues to be illuminated in how we can apply this and walk this out in our own lives.
And I pray that everything that is said today is not what I want to say, but Lord, it is what you want to say through me. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. So we're gonna be reading Romans 14 in a couple different verses in the second half of this verse, 13 starts off by saying, so let's stop condemning each other.
Decide instead to live in such a way that you will not cause another believer to stumble and fall. And if another believer is distressed by what you eat, you are not acting in love if you eat it. It. Don't let your eating ruin someone for whom Christ died for. The kingdom of God is not a matter of what we eat or drink, but of living a life of goodness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.
If you serve Christ with this attitude, you will please God and others will approve [00:04:00] of you too. So then. Let's aim for harmony in the church and try to build each other up. Don't tear apart the work of God over what you eat. Remember, all foods are acceptable, but it is wrong to eat something if it makes another person stumble.
It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything else if it might cause another believer to stumble. You may believe there's nothing wrong with what you are doing, but keep it between yourself and God. Y'all, that is the word of the Lord. Whew. There's so much in there and honestly it just makes me so emotional.
specifically verse 20. Don't tear apart the work of God over what you eat. And when I think about the work of God, I think of two things. First, Ephesians two 10 where it says that we are God's masterpiece. And we have a really great episode coming out next week about this verse, specifically [00:05:00] in a really, just fantastic guest that I'm bringing on.
She will be our first guest of season two. So I'm really excited to, have y'all hear that conversation. So we dive more into Ephesians two 10, but it says that we are God's masterpiece. We are his handiwork. Another translation says that we are his craftsmanship and we know that the Lord formed us together in the womb.
He is the potter, we are the clay. And he says, don't tear apart the work of God where he formed your body. Don't eat in a way that tears apart your body. And that can be as simple as continuing to eat dairy. If you know you're lactose intolerant,
continuing to drink caffeine, when you know it makes you jittery, you know that it makes you eat less food later on because it suppresses your hunger
and. Don't eat in a way where you're restricting so much that now your body's not fueled and your body's not functioning properly, and your digestion is slowing down and your brain function is slowing down. Sometimes when we don't eat enough, we experience brain fog and extreme [00:06:00] fatigue, so we don't want to eat in a way that tears apart the work of God, meaning your actual physical body.
And we don't want to eat in a way that tears apart the work of God, meaning the church, the body of Christ. So like, yes, we are temples of the Holy Spirit, but as believers we are a body of Christ. So collectively, altogether, don't eat in a way that is so divisive that now it's tearing apart the church.
And we know that a church isn't just a place that you go to. We are the church. So don't eat in a way that tears people apart and is so divisive. Because as we know, as Jesus said, a house divided against itself can not stand. It's not a firm foundation. And honestly, if we're trying to win people to the faith and we're trying to save souls, get people saved and spread the gospel, if we're eating in such a divisive way and we are fighting with each other back and forth and condemning each other and judging one another and being so shameful towards one another, that doesn't make people [00:07:00] want to come to Christ because people.
from the outside don't know God. They see Christians as a representation of God. So if they see you act in a fool, shaming other people for how they eat and just being so judgmental and cruel or even harsh towards your body and harsh towards yourself, like you are a representation of Christ.
So people are going to judge God. Based on you and your behavior. that's just how it is. one of the coordinators for the greeting team at my church. And we talk about that a lot in our trainings. Like, Hey, y'all, whether we like it or not, you are the first face that people see.
they've done studies where like 60% of the reason why people decide to return back to a church is based on how they were greeted. That first impression. That first reaction. And if you've ever church hopped. You know that it makes a difference. And here's the thing, people expect the worship to be amazing.
People expect the pastor to be [00:08:00] good people. Don't expect the parking team to be very friendly and nice, or expect the greeters to actually ask how you're doing more than a hello or ask, Hey, do you need any help? navigate anything, so people don't expect that. So when. We are front footed and we are, we have that hospitality and we shine the joy and the light of Christ.
Wow. It makes such a difference. And so I always say that to our greeters like we are representing God and people are judging God based on how we are representing him. So it's so important that we do that. So that's why it says here, let's aim for harmony in the church. Try and build each other up. Don't eat in a way that makes other people stumble.
And eat or drink in a way that is life-giving, and it leads to goodness and peace and joy and the Holy Spirit, all of those fruits of the spirit. And so if you're eating in a way, interacting with people in a way as it relates to food that is not leading to the fruits of the spirit, that's an indicator.
[00:09:00] Ooh, my flesh is getting somewhere caught up in this. Where is that? Lord, give me the wisdom. to see that. Give me eyes to see so that I can correct that and represent you Well,
I've been in several situations recently where people were eating and stewarding their body in a way that was extremely triggering for me and. I needed to separate myself from those people. So I'll give y'all a couple examples and it's in this text. Paul is putting the responsibility on us 'cause we can only control our behavior,
but. Paul is saying like, we should not be eating, you should not be eating in a way that causes other people to suffer. So we need to be introspective and think about that, but I can't control other people's behavior, but I can control what I do and how I respond and react and what I continue to expose myself to.
So. I'm in a very, happy, stable relationship now. But before I was in this committed relationship with Manny, I went on just one date with this other guy and we went to [00:10:00] go see a movie. Number one. I do not recommend seeing a movie on the first date. It's just hard 'cause you can't really have conversation.
I don't know why, I suggested that. But, anyway, all we did was get movie popcorn and this man's over here whipping out his phone. In the middle of the movie, number one, bro, turn down your brightness. Number one, rude, you can do this after. But he pulls up my fitness pound, starts tracking the movie popcorn in the middle of the movie.
And I turned him, I was like, bro, turn, turn your phone off. And I then I whispered him. I was like, are you tracking the movie popcorn right now on my fitness mail? And he said, yeah, yeah, I'm really gotta hit my macros. And like, this is probably like way too many carbs. I'm like. Oh my gosh. And I, I said to him after, I didn't bring it up right then, 'cause we're literally in the middle of the movie, but afterward I said, I'm gonna be honest with you like that, that was kind of triggering for me and I kinda walked him through my relationship with food and, what I do for a living. just the nature of that first [00:11:00] date. We didn't get a chance to talk too much about, what we did. And I, I'm sure he had like, seen on Instagram and stuff.
But, just my history and how I really came to this line of work and my history with disordered eating and my eating disorder and. I said, you know, that's, pretty triggering for me. Like, I used to track everything that I ate and, used to be super obsessive with that, but the Lord delivered me from that and, and set me free.
And so to see that, was kind of triggering for me. And he was just like, that's crazy that that was triggering for you. Number one has nothing to do with you. this is all for me. And honestly, you should be tracking what you eat because you shouldn't be eating so many carbs and all these things.
Like he just, he just went off. And about his relationship with food and like our bodies are tough, just everything that was like super condemning and everything that we try and heal from and get away from through this podcast. I was like, oh my gosh, Lord. I was just like, thank you Jesus, for revealing this man's character so early on.
And so anyway, never, never saw him again. So really had to set a boundary there and just say, Hey, I just don't think that's gonna work out. But that [00:12:00] is. An example of eating in a way that causes other people to stumble. You don't know other people's relationships with food. And I do have a group of clients that can take pictures of what they eat, maybe log, here and there, when it's spirit led, or in a season on an app.
But I generally do not recommend that, and I find that does more harm than good for the, patients that I work with. In the majority and the heal that stage of healing and recovery where I start working with them. it's not helpful and it generally becomes an idol and about control. So that's been the majority of our episodes on this podcast too, is like releasing control, surrendering that, and relying on our body's inner wisdom to tell us when, how much and what to eat.
Partnering with the Holy Spirit, not relying on external numbers to track our metrics and progress and to see if we're succeeding or not doing good or not. But I do have a couple, like maybe a handful, less than five right now on my roster that, are doing some sort of tracking [00:13:00] or logging and they can handle it and it's not triggering for them and it's something that we're talking through together and they're getting a lot of accountability there.
So there are some situations where you can see that as data, but I would never. Ask someone to do that or even bring it up if I thought that it would be triggering for them. 'cause most of the time it is and it's not beneficial to them. but if you are in a season of tracking, you do not wanna be doing that around other people because you don't know what people are struggling with, what they've walked through.
Because a lot of this stuff can be silent and you don't know if it may trigger something for somebody else. The other situation I was, Looking to find a roommate and, and move in with a friend. And it ended up not working out. The Lord really, was not leading us to that. and I believe that one of the reasons why was that she is going through, a season of training for a.
bikini competition and, I do have some, some personal thoughts about that and but I also don't [00:14:00] know what the Lord has convicted everyone of, and even though I personally don't feel that the Lord would lead us into something like that because it focuses so much on your physique and, can make the body in idle.
I also don't know if the Lord calls people into that spaces as a ministry to help heal. 'cause there's a lot of disordered eating and eating disorders that come up from, people that do those competitions. Especially after a lot of people fall into binge eating. And I've coached people after that when they really need to heal.
And it's just whiplash on the body. And I think that the Lord was honestly protecting me. 'cause if we were to be roommates while she was in that training, I would've been in that environment and. Seeing that, number one, like her body changed so quickly, but also her eating regimen and the meal prep and all of that.
And, when you live with someone, you, your conversations are like, Hey, how was your day? so you're talking about that a lot. And I think it's just that would've been personally triggering for me. And, so the Lord really just did not bless us living together. And, we're still friends, everything's cool.
but. [00:15:00] That's another situation where I can't control what other people are doing, but I can control how I respond to it and the environments that I put myself in. And there are some people that I follow on Instagram that I've had to mute. There are people that I've had to unfollow or things that I've had to block.
And that also shows the algorithm too. 'cause sometimes people will pop up on your for you page. You don't even know these people. But you have to either blocked or like not interested so that you train the algorithm to not send you triggering content like that. So if what I eat in a day, videos trigger you, you need to not be watching those, but scroll past them as fast as you can and put not interested so that you train the algorithm to not send you that content more often.
And we need to be front footed in that way. So we need to take personal responsibility so that we know and really are intentional and aware of how our actions may impact others. But if other people just have the, veil over themselves, scales over their eyes, and they don't see how their behavior is impacting people, ob spirit led in those conversations.
But the spirit may prompt you [00:16:00] to say something like, with that guy I said, Hey, that was triggering for me and I, and I advocated for myself. You didn't respond well. But you can't control how other people respond. You can only control what you say and your delivery. But then I could control if I was gonna expose myself to that continuously.
if someone in your environment or if there is an environment that causes you to stumble, we want to not put ourselves in that environment and however we can, let's go out and eat in a way that builds each other up and is in harmony and Doesn't cause other people to stumble because the kingdom of God is about so much more than what we eat or drink.
And I think we focus sometimes too much on those details where we need to zoom out and just see the bigger picture. we totally miss the plot that the goal is to love God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind. And to love your neighbor as you love yourself.
And to go out there, spread the gospels, set the captive free, and make disciples so [00:17:00] that's the goal, that's the plot.
And so if we get so zoomed in where now we're condemning each other and kind of have this infighting about what to eat and what not to eat, no. That God's already worked it out and God's going to speak to people personally. And it is not your job to correct people. It's not your job to be right. It's not your job to eat the cleanest and think that you're holier than thou.
It's your job to eat in a way that doesn't cause other people to stumble. And that may mean actually not tracking. Someday if you're around other people that you know have a relationship with food that has been disordered in the past, or maybe they had an eating disorder or to eat something that maybe you wouldn't normally eat, because if the goal is to live in harmony and to build each other up and to not cause division, don't let food be that dividing factor.
And that's okay because God cares more about the harmony and the body of Christ staying connected than over, specifically what foods we're eating or not eating. And so, yes, we wanna take what we [00:18:00] eat seriously because we're a temple of the most high God and the Holy Spirit, and this is his dwelling place, and this is a resource that he's given us to steward.
But let's not take what we eat so seriously, where now we're taking that to the nth degree, where now we're judging and condemning other people and thinking that we're holier, that now we're so nitpicky about what we eat, that it's leading to stress and anxiety, guilt and shame and condemnation, honestly, towards ourselves or other people.
So I pray that this series has been helpful for you. I pray that it's been illuminating and I pray that. The Lord speaks to you personally on how you can build up the people in your circle and model a healthy relationship with food and model Christ's light. Because we know that we are the light of the world and we're not meant to just be in a basket or not shine our lighter to be, if we are this lamp, we're not meant to just be put away, we're meant to be shining it, and we can do that through building each [00:19:00] other up.
Eating in a way that brings about peace and joy and goodness and love in the Holy Spirit, and not eating in a way that causes other people to stumble. if you are looking to heal your relationship with food and want to. Kickstart this journey with a faith-based approach and really find food freedom in Christ.
Then head to the show notes and sign up for a free 20 minute call with me. You and I will hop on Zoom. We'll talk about how you're currently eating, what you're struggling with. I'll give you some tangible nutrition advice to get started and some scriptures to meditate on that's speaking to your situation, and it is totally for free and I would love to chat with you and give you some initial tips.
I hope y'all have a great rest of your week, and I will see y'all next week for our first guest episode of season two
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