Episode 26 Transcript
[00:00:00] Welcome to The Be About Being Better podcast, where we help people make evidence-based sustainable. Small changes for their health that compounded the huge shifts towards a better, more vibrant life. I'm your host Abbie Stasior, a health and life coach, future registered dietician, a master's graduate from Columbia University, and a certified intuitive eating counselor.
And I believe that we can't make lasting or meaningful change single handedly. So I'm so happy that you're here so that together you can see that a diet free, sustainable lifestyle is possible, and you can leverage that to live a better life. And remember my disclaimer, This podcast is meant to give you general information.
And it's not meant to substitute or replace medical advice, a diagnosis or serve as treatment.
Abbie: Hello. Hello y'all. Welcome back to the Be About Being Better podcast. I have. An amazing, incredible episode for y'all today. And for those of you that been following mainly on my Instagram story,
You know that I've been leaning even more into my faith since I went through my breakup back in 2019 with my long-term boyfriend from college.
We were together for five years . I was completely devastated and we were living together and I, that's when I moved to New York City and that's also when I started my master's program. At that time, that's when I really started to dive more into my faith and then we had the pandemic and I started, at first I was listening to Catholic Mass on. And I was like, this is so boring. Like I was always waiting for the homily and then the homily was like five minutes.
And I'm like, all right. So I just watched this hour mass, 60 minutes of my life gone because I was waiting for like five minutes of inspiration and personal development. So that's when I started to get into Red Rock's Church and listening to more sermons online
and I was like, oh, this is so inspirational. And, and just so good. And they have campuses all over Denver. They have a campus in Brussels. They have three God behind bars, campuses, quote unquote campuses, but they are affiliated with different correctional facilit. As well. And they also have, their newest campus is in Austin, Texas.
So when I left New York City after I broke my leg during Covid, so after I, my leg healed during covid restrictions were starting to be lifted.
I left New York City, I moved outta my apartment and I started to travel all over the country. And I was basically just getting Airbnbs or staying with friends for the whole summer. And it was probably one of the best summers of my life. It was so fun. I spent a whole month in Austin, so I got to go to Red Rock Church and I'm like, wow.
I've been listening to their podcast now since the start of the pandemic. It had been like two years at that point. I'm so excited to go in person and it was an absolutely transformative experience. And on the fourth week they had baptisms, they had people that were planning to get baptized, but I just felt so-called, I got baptized and it was so, it was such a transformative experience growing in my faith and going through that baptism and people thought I was crazy.
And I'm just like, y'all, I knew know that I grew up Catholic and I was baptized Catholic, but I didn't choose to get baptized. This was me choosing to get baptized and choosing to have a relationship with God.
And that was really transformative for me. And to share that on social media was very vulnerable. I also got a number of, , really inspirational messages as well, you know, I was just authentically sharing, sharing my journey and I really saw that as a turning point for myself. Like while I'm choosing to enter a relationship with God and that was a moment for me where I'm like, this is not about religion.
This is about a relationship. And I was so excited to dive into that. And. Throughout my journey, I've connected with more people that are followers and believers and just children of God and people that are further along in their faith that have been helping me and who we're gonna have on the podcast today.
Mrs. K Hillman. That's her Instagram handle. That's what I call her. I just call her K but she is a huge inspiration to me. I mean, she was really there for me when, when I was on my faith journey and just plugged me in with other resources and was just so encouraging. So I wanted to bring her on, to the podcast to talk about faith and health and walking on your faith journey and what that means because that can help your physical body.
You're in this episode, you're gonna hear us talk about how your body is a temple and how you can be a good relationship with your kids and, how you. set that good example for your kids, both in faith but also with your healthy habits and how your faith and your health kind of are, are connected.
And if you're not plugged into church right now, maybe you have church trauma, how do you start to heal some of that? And if you've already started the healing process but you're kind of craving a little bit more, we give some tips on what to do next to move forward. So this episode is just so good, so transformative and it's kind of a risk to put out an episode like this.
It's vulnerable for me to talk about my faith but, but I just felt really called to bring Kay on and, have an episode like this.
I met Kay through Megan Yelaney, who is my business coach, and she was in one of my masterminds. So when we have a group of entrepreneurs that come together and we brainstorm. So we were together in the same cohort for six months and then we have just stayed in touch ever since.
Kay is absolutely incredible. So a little bit more about Kay, she's a mom of two. She's got the most wonderful sons, king and empire. She's a wife, she's a two-time c e o. She's the founder of a photography studio. Kay Hillman Photography, and she's based out of Atlanta for those wondering.
And she's also a Christian marketing and sales coach. Kay's just really passionate about teaching different service providers and different coaches how to create, how to market, how to sell profitable offers that support the lifestyle that you want.
And she's so transparent on social media about being a mom of two and how messy that can look in business. Trying to keep up with what you wanna do and the lifestyle and the season that you're in. How do you make that work and how do you make that profitable? So she's really good about customizing your business strategy for your lifestyle.
And she focuses on creating a sustainable business model and selling with integrity. And I have always admired that about her, and that's another reason I wanted to bring her on. I feel like our values very much aligned.
She's all about sustainability, and that's what we talk about on this podcast as well. And Kay believes that stepping into your calling by serving others and providing a deeper transformation through selling is really the best way to grow and scale a business. And she's just really on a mission to help moms specifically truly build a business of impact and, and time freedom.
So she's just all about so many great things. And when she isn't running her two companies, Kay is normally sitting on the floor eating cereal with her sons or her dog dragging her husband Tay along to target. I always see her on her Instagram Stories going to target, uh, Tay and Kay. Just so good. So good.
So y'all, thank you so much for listening to this episode, going in with an open mind and just letting, letting this episode change you. Ugh. I'm so excited for you to listen. Thanks for being here. Y'all. I am so excited to be back. Welcome to the next episode of the Be About Being Better podcast. I have a very special person joining me today, Mrs. Kay Hillman. Woo, Kay is, I mean, you just heard the intro. She's phenomenal. She's doing great things. She's doing the Lord's work, literally doing the Lord's work, and I'm so excited to have you
here, Kay.
Thank you.
Kay: Yeah, I was hoping for Abbey Squeal, so you have to put ABB squeal in the intro because it's, it's not a conversation if we don't have ABB Squeal. , yes.
Abbie: Oh, a hundred percent. Oh my gosh. Thank you for being here. I really appreciate it.
Kay: Of course. Thank you for having me, boo.
Abbie: So we're just gonna dive into the deep end. I wanna hear from you first. What is one thing that you've been through in your life that ultimately changed you for the better?
Kay: Yes. So I call it my bathroom moment because it was definitely when I dropped outta med school. So I didn't know I was gonna drop outta med school when I had the bathroom moment.
But it like all worked itself out to that point. So I went to med school I went to med school in Grenada and that's, some of my family is from there. So I was going to med school in like my native country, I guess. Mm-hmm. . And so, um, I went there to go to med school and everything was great until it wasn't, you know how like sometimes you're doing something and it's like, you feel like it's your life's work.
Like up until that time I was like, oh, I'm gonna be a doctor. My family, they wanted a doctor. It was just a lot of pressure. Like everybody is like, Kay is gonna be the family's doctor. And while that was cool and all, once I actually got to med school, I realized that yeah, this is not. It's not me.
It's not the vibe. Not the vibe. Right. It's not a vibe. It's not a, and you, I didn't realize it until I got there. Like I, I really, I enjoyed biology in school. Like I enjoyed my, , undergrad. I enjoyed all those things, but getting into school and being there, it was just like, this is not working. And so I remember every day, and this is why I call my bathroom moment.
I remember every day I had a roommate at the time. We had unaligned classes. So like she would have class and then I would have a break, and then like, we would just flip back and forth. Mm-hmm. . So at the end of the day, she had a class and I didn't, so I would go home and I would go in the bathroom, I would turn off the lights and I would just sit in the bathroom and cry and I would cry and I would pray and I would cry and I would pray like, I don't think I've ever cried that much in my life.
That was like six months of crying . Wow. I just had no clue, like, what am I doing with my life? Like, what is going on here? You know, I wasn't doing bad in school, but I also didn't. Feel like this is where I'm supposed to be. So, you know how you just have that feeling of like, what in the world am I doing?
And I, I was having that moment. Yeah. So I was like spending so much time just praying and trying to figure out what's going on. And then I'm scared because my whole family, like they raised money for me to go to school. Like, you know, everyone like pitched in friends, fa like everybody really pitched in for Kay to go to med school and here I am like, yeah, I don't wanna do this
So Wow. You can imagine like just the fear that I was feeling, but also that pressure of man, like everybody is looking forward to me and they're looking up to me to be this like shining beacon of an example for the family. And here I am, I don't wanna do it anymore. And that was a season of just like intense prayer.
That's when my faith really deepened because I realized like I have to trust God on what the next step is. Like I can continue going on this path, right? But maybe it's not the path he actually has for me. And that was scary to be like, okay, God, I'm gonna trust you and go back home and tell these people I'm not going back to school.
Like, what? Ridiculous. Yeah. Ridiculous.
Abbie: Wow, that is so wild. So how did you like break it to your family? What did they say? How did, and how did you navigate that period like immediately afterward?
Kay: Yes. So the first person I told was my brother. My brother and I have a very , close relationship. Like my, my brother can sense things about me.
Like people say we have telepathy because like something could be going on with him and I'll call him and be like, Hey, what's going on? And he's like, oh my gosh, you must have been feeling, and like vice versa. Wow. So, wow. He, he called me, he said, are you depressed? And I said, what? And he was like, are you depressed?
And you know, my, we have a lot of different mental health things going on. So when he asked that I knew, like, I knew that he knew something was wrong. Mm. So I just went ahead and I'm like bawling my eyes out, telling him. And he was like, oh, that's okay. You don't have to stay in school. And that one thing like just shifted everything for me.
Like I had so much confidence after that, just having somebody validate the fact that like, oh, I don't have to keep doing this. Like I, I was putting an unnecessary pressure on myself, girl. I called my parents the next the day and I told them, I said, Hey guys, I'm not really enjoying this. And my dad goes, oh, okay.
So do you want us to get you a plan and come home? Mind you, I still had like a month left of school, but he was like, ok, do you wanna come home, girl? And at that moment I was like, God, you are so real. Like you are so real. Like if I just trust you, everything, like my mom, she didn't, my mom didn't even say anything.
She was like, oh, okay. She was like, is that why you were crying the other day? They just knew.
Abbie: They knew ahead
Kay: of time. Right, and, and, and like literally when I came home, they were just like, it's okay. Like what are you gonna do? What do you wanna do next? They were like, do you need some time? it was like everybody forgot that I've been working towards this my whole life, , you know? Like, yeah. And it didn't matter anymore.
Abbie: I feel like this can be useful in other areas of our life too. How do you discern when something is just really hard?
Like med school's not easy. Yes. Especially the first two years where you're like, in class, it's so intense. The testing is just boom, boom, boom. Like there's no breaks. How do you discern when something is just really hard and when something's not aligning?
Kay: You know, that's such a good question and I always check my spirit when I reflect back to that time, I realize that my spirit was uneasy.
You know, when something is hard. you have a feeling of like, dang, this was challenging. Like, , , let's say you're going on a run, you know, you, you're running, uh, this is hard, right? But your spirit isn't broken. You aren't, you know, you're not gonna, halfway through the run, just collapse on the floor, unable to move.
You know what I'm saying? Like, you're not gonna have like a violent reaction to it. But when your spirit is feeling heavy, like I would have days that I would wake up and I'm like, I'm not going to class. I, I can't go to class today. Like, I just, I, yeah, I feel mentally depleted.
I feel spiritually depleted. , and I feel like that's the Holy Spirit, guiding and just showing you like, Hey, this is probably not the direction you want to go . In. And you can see this happen in a lot of things. Cuz like I said, with the Running analogy, it's like I go for runs. Runs are challenging, right?
Like a long run can be hard, you know? I mean, let's just be real. It can be hard. It's not something that's gonna have you just laid out on the side of the road, like, oh my gosh, I cannot move. I cannot exist. You know? But when you're having a spiritual battle, where it's like, oh my gosh, I don't think I should be going in this direction, right?
This direction is unaligned, this direction is the wrong way to go. Your body and spirit together has like a strong reaction. And that's where I'm able to see like, okay, this is discernment and it's honestly something that you have to practice, right? Like I've had to practice recognizing, you know, or discerning.
am I just, you know, complaining and whining about something? Or is this actually a issue that I need to like, dive deeper into and figure out what's happening? Mm-hmm. . Mm-hmm. And
Abbie: I, I just really feel that when you said that your spirit is depleted, your spirit is off. Cuz you know, I just got out of a relationship and I think I, I get frustrated with myself like, oh, why was I in this relationship for so long?
When I knew months before the relationship ended that it was, it was not right. You and I had even been on calls on Zoom and like we're supposed to talking about business, but I'm like, I'm just so consumed with how off this relationship feels. So I think I knew months ago, but I needed more data. I needed confirmation.
That it wasn't just circumstances. These were really patterns. The relationship wasn't working. And it wasn't just that I was going through a hard season, it was like, I just felt twisted and I felt so out of alignment and the relationship was holding my spear back from reaching my full potential.
Kay: I think it's humans, we do need that confirmation, right? Because we don't know the big picture. We're not, you know, omnipotent. Like, we don't, we can't, we don't always see the bigger picture. And so I don't think there's anything wrong with seeking confirmation.
If you look, you know, a lot of people sought confirmation from God. They ask like, are you sure? Like, you know, like if he was Jonah, he like went away 5,000 times, like trying to get confirmation. So it's like it's our human nature to . Seek confirmation. I, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
Um, but it does bet the question, cuz you a, you said something that I thought about with myself, like I. , I let my spirit be unsettled for six whole months, , you know, six whole months of just, you know, being a girl's name . Right. You know, and it's like, how crazy is that? But I also think that. It makes it to where at the end we trust him even more, because now it doesn't take me as long, you know?
And so I think that's the journey with discernment. It's like at first it's gonna take some time. At first it's gonna take, you know, bumping into the wall a few times. And I saw someone say that, you know, it's not always that you're running into a wall, but sometimes you just need the wall to lean on to rest.
And I was like, wow, what a beautiful way to say that. You know? And it's like, maybe you're not hitting a wall, but maybe you're just learning a lesson and you need the time to get there. And so discernment, it's not an easy thing cuz sometimes you discern something and it's like, man, but I really like that.
You know, like in my mind, I really liked the idea that I was gonna be the family's first doctor. I'm, I'm the most educated person in my family, you know, so well in terms of degrees. Um, everyone's very smart. , you know, I have the most, and most education and stuff like that. So in my mind, I was very tied to that goal and that idea.
So , when the Holy Spirit is like, oh girl, maybe this is not for you. I'm like, are you sure? Like, I like this. You know? There's so many things, like when you think about it, , it's sometimes hard for us to just stop right there in the moment and be like, okay, I'm not gonna do this anymore.
I'm gonna move on. And I feel like that's the journey with discernment of just over time, you'll build that muscle up. And if it comes easier and faster, you know, like now I feel like you have enough trust in yourself that you'll be able to know how your body reacts or how the Holy Spirit pours into you when you do need to course correct and kind of change what you're doing.
Yes,
Abbie: absolutely. And it just reminds me of that one meme where the little girl is holding a teddy bear and God's like given to me, you know? And she's like, no, but I like it. And he,
Kay: and he has a bigger one,
Abbie: a huge teddy bear behind his back. So yes. You know, sometimes doors close so that others can open. Yes.
And we, you're right, we don't know the larger plan and what he has in store for us, and if it's not this, then it's something better.
Kay: Yes. And that can be hard to realize too, because my, something better happened on the other side of, like, I, I tried school again, like I went from med school and then went back to school again.
And I love it on the other side of that with entrepreneurship. And I never, my family, they're full of entrepreneurs, but I never thought that that was the journey for me. Like you said, that girl wants the teddy bear so bad.
And you don't even realize that like God has something so much bigger for you if you would just. Let it go, you know, like, it's easier said than done. I would love to sit here and be like, oh yeah, it's so easy for me to just not worry about it. Girl, please, like
I am. So, you know, and I, and I'm very type a, I, I love my list, I love my plans, I love my strategy. Like, I love all those things. So it can be really hard when God is like, girl, trust me. Like, I got this, you know? So, yeah. . Yeah, it's been a journey. I, I
Abbie: think it, I think it takes time to, to build that, build that relationship.
And, you know, we have people listening to the podcast, all different faiths. We got people all over the world. you're a Christian entrepreneur. There are a lot of Christians that do listen to the podcast episode, and I'm Christian as well.
And we have people that, just through my conversations with clients or people in the audience, we have a couple different groups of people. We have some people that already know, like, God is my savior. God is the, the ruler of my life, and I am not consistent with my faith journey. And I want to lean into him more.
Like I already know that there have been so many blessings and I know that I can trust him, but I struggle to do that consistently. I struggle to read my Bible consistently, even though I, know I probably should. Um, so we have some people there that are kind of struggling with the consistency and they want to dive deeper and they've gotten a little taste of it, but they're thirsty for more.
And then we probably have some people that are burnt out on religion. Maybe they grew up Catholic, and this was me a couple years ago. Grew up Catholic and are just so like anti-church because they've been burned in the past. They've seen the corruption, just not gonna, so they maybe like, I mean everyone needs healing, but they maybe would want to lean into it if things were different, but they're a little skeptical, so, I would love to hear, and maybe we can start with one of these groups of people, but I would love to hear what you would suggest as far as starting to lean in and have that refreshing faith.
Maybe we'll start with the person already kind of knows that they want a relationship with God and something stronger. but , they're not consistent with it. What, routines or, What advice would you have for that person?
Kay: yes. So there are a couple of thoughts that I have. Um, your relationship with God and just faith is so nuanced. And the first thing I wanna say is a lot of people feel burnt out or just like overwhelmed or disconnected from God.
But really it may be like a religion as a construct, right? Mm-hmm. or like the actual church, right? And so one thing that I always tell people when it comes to their faith, walk in their faith journey and just like, oh, how do I set better routines? How do I spend more time with God? Is to remember that your relationship with him first is what matters, right?
It's not like, oh, going to church. I mean, while yes, we should do those things, right. First and foremost, focus on your personal connection with God. And so, like for me, I realized that our relationship with God sometimes happens in seasons, right? There are gonna be some seasons that we're like right there with them, you know, Bible study every day and you know, praying every, every hour and like we're just doing all the things right.
But then there's no seasons where it's like, oh wow, it's been a couple of days since I prayed, you know? Or Hmm. I haven't read my Bible in a, in a, in a week or so. Right. There's gonna be those kind of seasons too. And we have to remember not to be hard on ourselves because we're not perfect. Right? Right.
And so the first thing is just like when you are feeling maybe a little bit disconnected, it's to just remember that like, God is there for you whenever, right? Like he's all, like, it's not like you have to wait until, you know, Sunday or something in order to experience him or have an encounter with him.
Mm-hmm. . And so if you do find yourself a little bit off, just decide in that moment, like, okay, I'm gonna get back connected in, you know, I'm gonna get back plugged in. And for me, I have just found that the easiest thing to do is to like, listen to the Bible because sometimes like, I may not have time to sit down and actually read, you know?
And that's, that's kind of hard to say because people are always like, oh, if you have time to watch Netflix and you have time to, y'all come on now. Like, we gotta, let's just relax on that. Okay. . Yeah. I feel like that's just like shaming people. It really is. And it's so unnecessary. Like, it's so unnecessary.
So, um, I know for me, one thing I try to do is like, Whenever I get in the car and I'm going somewhere, I'll listen to the Bible. When I'm coming home I can listen to whatever, but like when I'm going somewhere mm-hmm. , like that's my time to actually listen to the Bible. And that just gives me like some kind of like small routine that I can grab onto where I know a few times a week I'm at least listening.
Even if I'm not having a chance to sit down and read it, I have a chance to at least hear it. And when you're driving, you're gonna Hear the word, like if something's gonna sit on you and it's gonna be great. So I do stuff like that. Or maybe, , in the morning when we're like getting ready for the day , I'll put on some worship music.
And I feel like worship music is a great way to just set your intention and just fill yourself with the spirit. Right. Fill yourself with something that's really good and really just, hopeful and encouraging. And I noticed that when I start my mornings off that way, me and the family, we have a great day, you know?
Mm-hmm. , because we've, we've started the day just filling, fill in our spirits. And so it's small things like that that can help you stay connected even if you're feeling separated from God, even if you're feeling like, huh, we're, you know, I'm really struggling to. Be more intimate with him. Um, and again, I I, I like to tell people your relationship with God sometimes happens in seasons.
And I know that people feel like, oh, but that's like being hot and cold, but it's not. Right. We are human and we have to give ourselves grace. God gives us grace. Why can't we give ourselves a little bit of grace? You know what I'm saying? And so it's not saying that like, oh, you know, I'm just gonna do whatever I wanna do and hit up God later.
But it's more so like, Hey, you know what I'm saying? Like, it's more so like, you know, sometimes life happens, you get swept up and things, kids get sick. Work gets hectic, right? And because we're human and our mind can only focus on so much, sometimes we. Leave God out. And that's not to say it's okay to do that, right?
But it is to say like, Hey, when you recognize that you have done that, try doing small things like what are the little steps that you can take to have a bigger impact? So that's what I would say for like the, that group of people that like, they know that you have a relationship with Christ, but it's like, well, where do I kind of go with this?
It's just find those small things that you can do to be committed. And then when you're ready and you're in it, you can be like, all right, Bible study every day. Let's do it , let's do it.
Abbie: You can start to build on that momentum. Absolutely. Yes, absolutely. And um, you know, as a mom of two, I'm sure you have to get a very creative with how you fit that in.
Do you have any tips for other moms or like, what, what does your routine look like? It might not even be a routine
Kay: girl. Listen, full transparency. That has been the biggest struggle for me. That has been the biggest struggle for me. But something that I've started to do is reframe my relationship with God.
And it's not just my relationship with. With him, but it's also the kids' relationship with him. And when I did that, it helped me realize like, oh, where I used to think quiet time and time with God was with myself. Now I realize that. I do need to include the kids in that time. And so even though in theory I would love to just sit down with God in my prayer closet by myself and just do my thing, I recognize that like the kids are looking at my example.
So now I sit on the sofa and I, and I'll read the Bible and I'll read it to them. , they have a children's bible, so I'll read it to them, right? So now my quiet time looks less like, oh, me spending just my time with God. And we're like, okay, God, I'm bringing my children. And he knows, like, God know I got kids.
Come on now. .
Abbie: And I, I think he also like rewards the, the effort. He knows your intention.
Kay: Yes. And it's, and it's stewardship, right? Like, God gave me these children and I'm giving them back to him. It's, it's setting that example and creating that foundation for them. Because I know for me growing up, while my parents, you know, my parents are Christian and, you know, they wanted us to go to church.
I never really saw them have a relationship with God . I never saw any intimacy with God and anything dealing with God was more so like on the punishment side of things. Not necessarily having like, a heart posture towards him, right. A positive heart posture towards him and stuff.
And so because of that, you know, it really took a lot of work and a lot of undoing, for me to really have a true relationship with God that wasn't based around. Just fear as in, oh my gosh, I'm gonna go to hell, right? Like, if I do this, I'm going to hell. It wasn't like that's how my relationship was, and now it's like, oh no, I do these things because I love him, because I want that intimacy and connection and because I wanna be c covered and protected.
That's the relationship that I want. Versus like, oh, okay, I'm not gonna look over there because if I look, go to hell like , that's, that's not, that's not it for me. So I feel like with kids especially, it's really important for them to see our true relationship with God so that they can form a healthy relationship with them as they grow as well.
Which, mm-hmm. , at first I was like, I don't know, it was kind of weird. I was trying to like separate the two, like, oh, this is the time with my kids and then this is not with God. now that I've kind of evolved a little bit, I'm able to see , okay, you know, Again, quiet time. It may include the kids or maybe I'll set them up.
, like that's why the worship music in the morning thing works really well because it's like, it's something that we can all participate in. Mm-hmm. and I can still be poured into while they are too. And now, oh my god, my oldest. He is so cute because he'll hear some worship music and he'll just start praising and I'm like, oh my God.
Like, it's just, it's just beautiful. To see the relationship grow and and that's what I want for my kids, you know? And I'm sure that other parents, I want that too, for my future kids. Yeah. Claim that.
Abbie: Wow. That is so beautiful. And I've talked about that with, health coaching clients that are moms that I've had is, you know, You were doing your journaling by yourself.
If you were doing a meditation by yourself and now you have kids, it's you're in a different season. Let's loop them in. Let's meditate together. Let's have them write down three things that they're grateful for already. Start to instill that practice. If you want your kids to be healthier eaters and to have a greater affinity for fruits and vegetables, you need to get them involved in the cooking process.
I'm not saying that they need to be on the stove, but they could be going to the grocery store, helping you pick out the ingredients, or looking through a cookbook and seeing what looks good. Or growing a garden in your backyard or even just growing some herbs. Yes. Like you can get them invested in the process and they will over time have more of a curiosity for it and more of an affinity for that.
So that definitely goes for their faith as well.
Kay: Yes. That's such a good point that you make though, with that because , something that I notice with my own kids, because I started them early on, like, you know, they were eating different vegetables and stuff. Now King will ask for a snack and he'll be like, oh mama broccoli.
And I'm like, what? Can't we eat broccoli for a snack? You know? But like, love it, like you said. Right. But like you said, it, it's so true. Like when we make them part of the journey, when we let them be part of the process, they're affinity is much stronger, but also , It's just in them, right? Like
He doesn't know anything else, but he also has a positive relationship with it, right? It's not like he's, you know, having to hide anything or, there's no shame around it. It's like, oh, this is who I am. I enjoy broccoli, right? Okay, this is who I am. I enjoy worship music in the morning.
I feel like in anything, if we just set those examples and even for ourselves, like the more you start to do it and the more you start to feel rewarded for the different things that you do and not. . It doesn't have to be an actual like physical reward, but you feel better, right?
You feel healthier, you feel happier, you feel more fulfilled, right? The more that happens, the easier it becomes to be like, oh, like this is just what I do. I just wake up and listen to worship music. When I get in the car, I just play my scriptures. When I, am making the snack, I go for the cucumbers instead of cookies, and sometimes you go for the cookies and that's fine, right? Sometimes you decide to listen to something else, and that's okay too, right? Just giving ourselves a little bit of wiggle room and grace. But on a normal, we are probably gonna stick to those more routines because we're routine creatures.
Like we love habits. Mm-hmm. and systems and stuff like that. So I love all that stuff because for sure
Abbie: it definitely works. I, I think you can start to almost build that habit. Like a lot of the clients that I work with that then say to me, Hey, like can you send me a sermon that you think would resonate with me?
This is what I'm struggling with now. These are my goals. You know, people that wanna lean into their faith. Once they have optimized their routines, once they start meal prepping, once they start drinking enough water, once they start getting enough sleep, where they actually have the emotional capacity and the energetic capacity to take more on and tackle their faith because maybe they've had church trauma in in the past.
So I, I think if you're leaning into your healthy habits in these routines, you can create more space. Kind of clear out the gunk. Yes. To invite more in and invite God in specifically if that's what's meant for you.
Kay: I 5000% agree with that. That's so true. And, and um, one of the ones you mentioned was sleep.
Oh my gosh. When I had King, I was struggling so hard. I was like, God, I know you're not listening to me. I know you just , you just went somewhere else. You must be at somebody else's house cuz you cannot be here. Like, I don't know what's going on. Mm-hmm. , but I was tired. Right. I was sleep deprived.
And so because of that all I could think was like God was against me. Right. Which obviously he's not. It's just I have a baby. It's part of the process. Right. Right. Um, , I realized like I started eating better cuz I was eating junk like all the time. . I mean, you're already using up so much energy breastfeeding and then on top of that Yes. Just not, not taking care of my body. Like that was too much. And so when I started taking care of myself, I started drinking more water, I started getting better quality sleep, even though it was kind of chopped up, the quality of my sleep was better.
And then I was able to wake up with just a different perspective and I was able to wake up and be like, you know what, maybe I don't have time. Like maybe I feel a little bit overwhelmed to sit down and read the Bible. And so I started doing little things, like listening to sermons and then I was able to, you know, now I'm still, I'm getting sleep, I'm eating better, I'm feeling better. And now, like you said, your capacity, , it just, it's like a fog lifts. And I, and I call the postpartum phase like a fog, cuz sometimes we're just walking through this, this season and we really don't know what's up from down.
And so as you're going through that fog, taking care of yourself helps, helps clear it up, right? You start to feel a little bit better, like your body feels better and then what happens next you're, you're able to fuel your spirit and now you feel better all the way around. So like, that was such a good way to put it because it really is like, I experienced it twice with both my kids and the second time it was so much easier because I recognized, oh, I need to take care of mama's body, like the temple needs to be taken care of so that I can actually come to God and really feel like I can have a connection and relationship with him without feeling crazy.
Like we already feel crazy, like , you know, the junk food don't help. So, yeah. Yeah.
Abbie: Yes. Yes, absolutely. And I love that you said our temple because we hear that, oh, our body's a temple is body temple. But there are some biblical truths to that. And if we are not taking care of our physical health like that, that's almost kind of like a dis to God.
Like he has blessed us with this body.
And so I'd be curious to hear what you think about like your body as a temple taking care of it, and any religious connections to.
Kay: So I'm glad you gave space for it because it gives me permission to just be like, Hey, I'm not perfect. Um, and so, but the first thing I'll say is that we're never gonna be perfect at it, you know?
And I'm gonna come from the standpoint of like being a mom. I used to be, a fitness influencer, which I have a whole tyrant about fitness influencers, but whatever. I'm sure you do too, but we're not gonna go there today. So True. But, um, I'm no longer part of that cult. And so now that I'm on the other side of things as a mom, I've come to realize that just like anything in life, there's gonna be seasons.
And so what I try to do is be as kind to my body as I possibly can, especially as a mom, it's so easy to beat up on yourself. It's so easy to feel like, oh, I didn't snap back fast, you know, just all the different things and.
My philosophy right now is I'm going to eat what makes me feel most alive. And sometimes that's gonna be a slice of cheese pizza and sometimes it's gonna be a nice leafy green salad. Yes. It depends on the moment.
Abbie: Yes. Oh, I thought, okay. I mean, we talk about that so much on the podcast,
when I say that one of the intuitive eating principles is to make all foods available, I think people assume, oh, well this girl's just telling us to go eat crap all the time. It's like, no, you can eat those things, but you also have to be respecting your fullness. You also need to be leaning into the satisfaction factor, being fully present when you're eating that food.
Because if you eat pizza cake and cookies all the time and like sugary cereal, uh, and you're really in tune with yourself, that's not gonna feel good all day, every day. No. You are gonna start to crave some , fruits and vegetables. Yes. If you're really in tune with yourself.
Kay: Yes. Agreed. Love that.
That's so true. And , even . Like with what you drink, I went through this whole kick where I was like, craving Dr. Pepper and I love Dr. Pepper. Like, hey, loves Dr. Pepper. And, um, but I went through this thing and I realized that I was thirstier and I would have crashes. And I didn't realize that I was having like a sugar crash until a couple of months of just hardcore drinking Dr.
Peppers. Like wow. It was ridiculous. And because in my mind I was like, oh, this feels good. This feels comfy. But my body quickly told me, well, not quickly. I feel like two months was a long time to go. But, um, it quickly told me like, girl, you're dehydrated. You are thirsty. Like you need, we want water. And so,
I think the other thing about thinking about your temple and, and just even with the season's analogy, it's like there are gonna be times that maybe you are a little bit more lax. Right? You're, um, a bit more indulgent and that's okay. Like, I mean, but it don't gotta be a holiday for Kay to indulge.
Like, let's be real right now after this, I'm probably gonna go eat a snicker bar. I'm not gonna lie. Like it is what it is. But I also am mindful of like, am I eating because I'm actually hungry? Or am I eating because I'm stressed? Mm-hmm. Like just really thinking about what my body is doing. And then when I'm thinking about my faith, I also think about like, okay.
I was given this body to be a good steward of it, right? I was given this body and I, and I'm here as this person. If my body is not feeling well, I can't do the work that I'm called to do, right? Mm-hmm. , if I'm tired and, you know, in the middle of the day for no apparent reason, when really it's because I ate, you know, entirely like I, I overate and now I'm, you're in a food coma.
Right. You know what I'm saying? , if I'm doing all that, how can I show up and do the work that God wants me to do? Mm-hmm. And at the end of the day, we can hide from a lot of things, but we can't hide from God. You know, we can't hide from him.
I think you mentioned , being really present. That's something I had to learn. It's like be more present with the foods that I'm eating or when I am eating and I just realized like, wow, you know, when I take care of this body, I'm able to do so much more. I'm able to serve in my church. Like,, there were times that , I wouldn't even be able to go to different ministries and stuff like that because,
I just wasn't feeling well, like my body was physically not feeling well, and I feel like a lot of times your body not feeling well. It's the first indication that everything is about to go downhill. You know? Like as soon as your body is taken out mm-hmm. there, you can't do anything else. Like, you really can't show up and do anything else when your body is not well.
And it took. Took me a while to learn that. And now that I have kids, I wanna be able to run and play around with them. I wanna be able to, do all the different things that we do, all the different activities. And I can't do that if I'm not taking care of my body. And then also remembering that I'm setting the example for them.
I want them to enjoy foods, all different types of, I want them to enjoy it. I don't want them to have an unhealthy relationship with it, but I also don't want them to allow food to be a stumbling block and be used as something that keeps them away from doing whatever they're called to do in life because they're just having these unhealthy food relationships or food attachments.
So it's kind of like a circular effect, really. But yeah.
Abbie: And I love that you're thinking about that and your children's relationship with food when you have two sons. Cause I think people assume like, oh, like my daughter's going to have, you know, an eating disorder or is more at risk for that.
But it's like men have eating disorders too, and we need to Yes, they do. Yeah. We need to be thinking that everyone needs to have a good relationship with food,
Kay: right. And I mean, just thinking about health factors, . There's things like high blood pressure and, you know, uh, diabetes, like there are all these other diagnosises and things that our kids can have and that we can have, right. It's not just our kids. It's anybody can have these things.
And so having that healthy relationship with food, it can, it can help those things. When I, um, was pregnant with my oldest, I got high blood pressure, you know, with pregnancy, pre-eclampsia. I had that and, um, and then they had me on blood pressure pills even after I had had the baby and stuff.
And so, oh, you know, I'm sitting here like, what's going on? So, but I realized it was a lot of the things I was eating right. What I was eating was making it worse. Like it wasn't the only factor, but it was, it was making the situation worse. And that really helped me realize like, oh, okay.
And, and that's why I try to label foods as good or bad because what your body may be able to process, mine might not be able to, and that's okay. It doesn't mean that it's a bad food or anything. It just means like, okay, now I know and, and I feel like it's a trial and error kind of thing.
What works best for me may not work for you and vice versa. So, . I really just try to be mindful and just be kind of gracious with myself and, and learning more about how to take care of my body because at the end of the day, this is all I got. This is all I have, and I wanna be able to do the work I wanna be able to come on these podcasts and talk about God.
I wanna be able to grow my business and, and, and share God's love there. I wanna be able to pour into my church, whether it's financially or participating in a ministry or something like that. And so I'm not gonna be able to do that if I'm not actually taking care of my body in the first place.
Abbie: Absolutely. And like you said, you are, a steward of, of your body, the body that God's given you. Now I think we kind of touched on this, but I'd be curious to hear if you have any other tips or advice for someone that really is burnt out by religion, maybe has some church trauma, and is just like, I don't want.
Anything to do with that and like the corporate world of religion. Um, yeah. What would you say to that person? Like, okay, let's first . Maybe try and work on our physical health to kind of clear up some of the gunk and maybe just focus on that relationship versus religion.
But I would love to hear you expand on that. Yeah.
Kay: I feel like the hardest part with that is that, church trauma comes up in so many different ways and sometimes you don't realize it, you know? Mm-hmm. , um, because I was one of those people that I used to think like, oh, I, I've never experienced church trauma until I Got into a healthier environment and then I was like, oh That was not normal . Oh. But you know, right. Like what happened here? Okay. So, um, what I will say is that the, a couple of things, um, the first one is therapy. And a lot of people, a lot of Christians have a weird relationship when it comes to therapy cuz everybody feels like, oh, just rely on Jesus and pray it away.
Mm-hmm.
Just sprayed away. , can't, I'm in therapy too. And you need can't, we can't, yeah, you need both. And, and it's okay to have both. And so I wanna start there by saying like, go get a little bit of support, but from a unbiased source.
And that's why I say therapy. And then the next thing is to find your community. And that may look like, looking at people on social media and social media is just the way we do things now.
You know, , before we didn't do all the social media stuff, but now since we do have social media, it is, sometimes a really good tool. But like, go and try to find a community. People that you can see yourself reflected in, because something I think that happens, um, for a lot of us that experienced church hurt is that these were our churches that we grew up in.
We were kids. We didn't make that decision. So those really are not our people. We wouldn't have chosen them. We, it's like our family. You don't choose your family, sometimes I don't choose my parents, right? I just got, I just got them and it's cool. Thanks God. Like I'll, I'll accept them or whatever, but we didn't choose certain people and I think a lot of times when we experienced church hurt, it's because , maybe you grew up a certain way so when you are kind of trying to come out of that, getting that therapy and then finding the people that you are choosing to be a part of is gonna be super important because now you'll be able to see what it's really like to be plugged into a church home and a church community that is actually for you, right?
Mm-hmm. . And so one thing that I try to be mindful of when I'm looking for a church for my family is, what does it look like for my kids? And is this somewhere that as they grow up, it's not going to damage them, right? Because it may be a good fit for Kay, but it may not be receptive for children. Like there are some churches that it's not really the best place for your kids to go, not because it's unsafe, but because there's no community for them, so now they're around adults that are judging them, that are making them, uphold standards that bro, he's two. Like he , you know, you can't, right? You can't expect a two year old to sit here in this church service this whole time quiet, right? So it's like different things like that just.
Really setting up the entire family for success. . But I feel like really finding your. People and for me right now, being fully honest, I'm struggling to find an actual church home. But I have found people, I've found people in different places online, and the person that I'm able to connect with, we have Bible studies.
You know, I, I have, I have so many Zoom Bible studies. It's ridiculous, I have so many people that'll text me like, Hey, this is what I learned today. Like, you know, even finding those little things. Mm-hmm. And that will start to heal you. And as you start to heal, you'll wake up one day you'll be like, I'm ready to find a church.
Right. I'm ready to find a home. I'm ready to, commit. But it's like taking those small steps. And I'm not saying you need to find a ton of people. You can find one person and be like, you know what, this is my person. I'm connected to them. I want to intimately grow in my relationship with them and I wanna be honest with them.
I feel like with you and me, we've had a honesty about our faith and just where we are. That's been so beautiful. and so healing for me, and I didn't even realize I, I needed some healing at the time, you know? And it's like sometimes you just need that one person that you can kind of walk through faith with and walk through your journey wherever you are.
Right? Even if you're in that messy face of like, yeah, I'm done with the church. That's cool. Most of us at some point are really done with the church, and that's why you do find your actual people so that when you are ready, It's like, okay, I've healed, I've been able to walk through this process and now I'm ready to find a, a, a home where I can plug in and be more active, in the community.
And so, and let's be honest, you don't have to be in a church to do those things, like I still volunteer, I still do different things, but , I don't necessarily always go into a building. Now we've started going to different churches just cause we're testing some things out, but it's a process, right?
You'll get there when you get there. Mm-hmm. . And I feel like that's just the plight of us as Christians in this age. . In the, in this time period, things are just gonna look a little different. , and I feel like almost in a weird way, it looks like how things look like in the beginning, you know, the church didn't have a building, when Christ was walking around.
Like he wasn't walking around just the buildings. He was, ministering to people on the side of the road in the ocean and stuff. It wasn't just in a building,
Abbie: yeah. And it's about the people. Even, you know, the church that I found in Nashville, it's like, the church is not a building church is a people.
And we, we are the church. And I'm like, oh, that's so good. And I'm really happy because, I'm in Nashville now, I'm in the Bible bell and there are some H B O documentaries about some problematic churches that are right down the road for me. And I'm like, yes. I came here. I'm like, yikes. I was skeptical going in, but I'm happy that I found my church family.
And one thing I was thinking about is I don't have kids now. , but I will in the future, and if I really wanna put roots down in Nashville, I wanna make sure that I commit to a place that I also can grow in generationally. Yes. And they, they do have a really strong kids program, so if you ever find your way in Nashville,
Kay: I know where to go.
Abbie: And they're very similar to Red Rocks. That's why I like them. I feel like their sermons are very similar. The energy's similar. The worship's similar.
Red Rocks did so much for me in the beginning, and even though, you know, I don't listen to their sermons every single week now, just here and there if me Too title speaks to me.
Mm-hmm. , I just owe so much of the beginning of my faith journey to them. .
Kay: Seriously put them in the, in the show notes. Like for those of you that wherever you are in your journey, I feel like Red Rocks their podcast, they, they just share their sermons, um, from each week.
And I just feel like it's, again, sometimes you just have to start small. . Just start somewhere and maybe you just are not ready to go into the building. . I'm gonna be honest, going into a church. The first time is so intimidating. People don't talk about how intimidating it is, whether you are a believer like you've been going to church regularly, or whether this is your first time coming back or your first time coming.
It's not intentional, but sometimes you can feel like the outsider. You can feel like, oh man, do I really belong here? And so, and I feel like that's where a lot of people's church hurt comes from as well. I know for me it came from, we used to move around a lot and we used to visit churches and the first thing they, they wanna do is tell the visitors to stand up.
And it's like, , I don't want to stand up. I wanna be a part of what you guys have going on. And I, I get the, the idea that you're trying to welcome us, but it doesn't feel welcoming. You know, it feels, feels very like, oh, I'm the outsider. And so, I feel like, listening to the podcast like that, listening to, you know, sermons or listening to Bible studies and listening to the . Bible, those different things can really help you no matter where you are in your, your journey.
But especially if you are a little intimidated or a little bit nervous about going into a building right now. Mm-hmm. or maybe you just haven't found your places like these kind of resources. It's just like, wow, thank God for this. Cause like I listen to stuff on YouTube all the time and it's whole communities have meaning in the comments and you're, you're able to just, yeah, that's so true. Have conversations with people and now you're able to , attend people's virtual bible studies.
Like, it's just, it's so much that you can do. And as you get there, you can add something else, it's not saying you have to jump in and do everything, but just pick one thing. Like, today I'm gonna listen to a podcast tomorrow you might decide to pray. . It just depends on where you are in your journey.
. And I think that's the really cool part about healing , and just, drawing back to God when you're ready.
Abbie: Yeah, absolutely. I think the podcasts are really great. We will link them up in the show notes if you want to dive into the Bible.
What would you suggest for that? Are there certain verses or chapters that you recommend people start
Kay: with? So, , actually I'm not one of those people. If you wanna just start back reading the Bible, I always tell people to just grab one of those, the Bible apps, either 365 day or the 90 day plan.
, I just did the 30 day plan. That was ridiculous. , that's a lot of reading, but, um, wow. So did you
Abbie: listen to it or
Kay: did you read it? Both. I listened to and I read because like sometimes with the kids, I wasn't able to in 30
Abbie: days, like how many hours did that take a day?
Kay: , so when you listen to it, it's like two hours, two and a half hours.
Yeah, girl, it's, it's insane.
Abbie: I'm doing the, bible in a year right now. But, it's a yearly plan. It's only 20 minutes a day and I'm like, that's kind of nice. And some days I'll, you know, miss a couple because I'm doing something else in my morning routine.
But then I'll catch up and during a workout or something, or if I'm cooking, then I'll catch up and it's like, oh, it's just like an hour. Podcast, basically, let's do a couple episodes. So that's been really easy for me, but I'm also like, oh my gosh, I've been consistent and I'm caught up now, but This is only 30 days. I'm like, we got so many other days.
Kay: But remember we're in different seasons, right? So I'm in a season where right now I'm not looking to go.
Um, and this is gonna sound so weird. , but just go with me here. I'm in a season where I'm not going deep into . The word I just wanna understand the big picture, the big context. I just wanna see God in Jesus in the big picture. So I'm reading, I'm, I'm skimming, right? I'm skimming, like, okay, okay.
Where's Jesus? Where's Jesus? You know what I'm saying? And, and I'm getting at, you are in a season and, and many people are in a season, and I just came out of the season war. I'm going deep, right? Mm-hmm. , I'm trying to see, what did God say? What is God doing? Who is God? Who is Jesus? What is he saying here?
So you're going deep. Neither one of us is wrong, we're just in two different seasons, there's an objective, right? You have a reason for why you're reading the whole Bible.
five days. And that's, that's for you. And I have my reason for, you know, chopping it through. Let, let's go. Mm-hmm. , you know. Okay. I love that we're in two different Yeah, it's two different Headspace. And, and, and that's the cool part I think about the Bible app, is that
everybody can find something, but , also the Daily Grace skill, I think I, I told you about them. Yes. But like, they have a bunch of biblical resources that are really, really good. I'm about to start an Esther study and feel like they have really good Apple studies.
Love Esther. They have an app. Esther is my jam. Okay. Yes.
Abbie: Oh. If you ever have a daughter,
Kay: Esther is gonna be girl. It's gonna happen. . Yes.
Abbie: Okay. We need to link up in the show notes to your Esther podcast episode because that like changed my life. So good. Oh.
Kay: I'm so glad that, that, that really makes me feel so good. And you know what? I love this, like, I love what you're doing because, in the last couple of years I've been sharing my faith a lot more with my podcast and with just my comedian and stuff.
And I didn't start this at all, but , it's just so fun to see like more and more people really share their faith inside their platforms that aren't about faith. , and so it just makes me feel so happy and so blessed like that. My podcast is, it's a business podcast, right?
it's a marketing and sales, and the fact that you really enjoyed that episode and there's lots of other people that have also enjoyed an episode that while yes, I tied it a little bit into business, it. About business. Like it was about, scripture And so that just like really blesses me to hear you say that cuz I mean, you never know how people will receive something.
Um, but I love to hear that people actually enjoy those types of episodes. And I'm actually starting to do them more because I just, I've always enjoyed talking about my faith. I just didn't do it because it's like, oh, you know, just talk about business or for you, like, just talk about health. And it's like, but we're so much more than that.
Mm-hmm. .
Abbie: Absolutely. And that's why I wanted to talk about it. So, I mean, it's definitely a risk. I don't know what the downloads are gonna be like for this episode, but I just felt really called to bring you on as a guest and to be talking about my faith more. And I feel like I've gotten to a point where I feel more comfortable talking about it.
When I, when I first started, yes. I was like, I can't even formulate the words. I still don't even know like who Jesus is. I'm like, I know who he is, right? But I don't really know who he is. So now, and , I don't even really consider myself there or as advanced in my faith or as fluent.
As you are cuz you've just been doing this for so many years. But I feel more comfortable and I knew that this was going to challenge me to even deepen that and to work on actually expressing it. Yes. And I think people need to hear like, I just needed to trust that this episode is gonna land with the people that need to hear it at the season that they
Kay: Exactly. And you know what this so beautiful that you're gonna see is that just like you said, oh because I've been doing it for a few years, there's gonna be somebody that they're at day one and they're getting to see Abby in year one or year two, and it's gonna be like, like they're looking to you.
It's like, wow, one day I'm gonna be there. You know? And that makes me like kind of emotional when I think about it cuz everybody can, oh girl, I'm about to get emotional. But like everybody can be alike for somebody. Depending on where you are in your journey, right?
And so while I may be at this level, there's gonna be somebody that's looking at you like, wow, okay, in six months, I can be there, and in one year I can be there. And how encouraging is that to know that like all of our experiences are not in vain, like nothing that we experience is in vain.
And just taking that step to have faith and believe and, and hope and desire and want more that can trickle down and impact somebody else's life. So hugely. And that's, that's the reason why I'm able to say so committed. Even when I don't feel like it, even when I'm feeling disconnected or tired or exhausted, it's like, okay, I'm gonna give myself today, I'm gonna give myself grace today, but tomorrow I'm gonna try again because I know that it may be my sons and maybe my husband, right?
My husband, maybe look into me like, oh . Wow, like she was tired, but she still, listened to a podcast or she listened to, a worship music or something like, that could be encouraging him or, my sisters like, it could, it doesn't have to be like a global impact, but, just being able to impact that one person.
Like, that's what God wants from us, you know? So I just wanna give you credit girl, because listen, talking to you sometimes really encourages me too. You know, and you, you say I'm further along, but it's like I'm encouraged seeing. , you still show up and step up in your faith, even when you are feeling like, oh, I don't really know.
But it's like, wow, that's so encouraging. Like, even though you don't know, you still trying anyway like that. Mm-hmm. , that's a testament of like your commitment to this, so. That's just for anybody, you know, don't let the amount of time that you've been, connected with God don't let that be the thing that keeps you away or makes you feel like you can't speak on something because you really can, like, even if it's day one for you, you can speak to somebody that's on day zero,
Abbie: absolutely. Oh, that's so beautiful. And it makes me think it's something that we were talking about, at my church in a recent sermon was like, the seats that you are sitting in right now, like they used to run that church out of, somebody's house and there were eight people there. Yes. And now there's people in overflow rooms and they're, they're moving into another space soon to like offer, offer more space to people cuz they're just flocking there.
But the people that started years ago, invested in the seats that you're sitting there today mm-hmm. . So it's like, now we need to, we can't just think about us. We need to think about, okay, we need to be supplying the chairs for the next people so that they have a seat at the table.
Kay: I'm like, [00:53:20] oh, that's so good.
Yeah. That is so good and so beautiful to be a part of. Like how cool is that? Yeah. That we're a part of just bringing, and it's not even that we're bringing one person in. I always say like, I'm, it's not my job to bring you in. I just have to be the example. You're gonna do it for yourself,
like, people are gonna come in so like, wow. So great . That we can be a source of encouragement or light and maybe that will change something for someone and they'll decide like, oh, okay, I'm ready to go back to church. Or I'm ready to, I'm ready to listen to the Bible or something.
Like, it could be something, something really small, , for them in that season, but something just so big in the bigger picture of things. Mm-hmm. .
Abbie: Absolutely. Absolutely. Oh, I love this so much. Now is there anything before we close out, before we go over where to find you, are you promoting anything right now?
We'll definitely link your podcast in your social media, in the show notes. , and then I have my clues out question that we ask everyone. , but is there anything before we get into that, That God's just putting on your heart right now that you wanna say or get out to the masses?
Kay: Oh wow, this is a good one.
, I think the biggest thing that I would say is that God is there when you're ready. We don't have to put any unnecessary pressure on ourselves. prayerfully, the world isn't ending. We don't know. Every day someone says the world is ending. So it is what it is at this point. But, God is always there when you are, when you're ready, and he's always gonna receive us, when we turn to him.
And so for the person that made me feeling like you're really like, cause I, I was in a season a few years ago where I was just feeling really disconnected and I was like almost scared to come back to God. Like, ugh, he's gonna be upset, like blah, blah, blah. All the, all the things that we think, right?
And um, and someone told me, He's there when you're ready. And so I just want to say to whoever needs it or whoever's listening, like he is there when you're ready. Um, that may be today, that may be tomorrow, maybe three months from now. . But he's gonna be there for you. And it's not that he's gonna be there for you just then, he's still with you right now.
So you may feel disconnected or away from him, but he's still there regardless. And so that's the last thing I'm gonna say. Oh, so good.
Abbie: Thank you. And, my last question is, what is something that you are going to do this week to better yourself or better your days?
Kay: Oh girl, this is a hard one cause I still feel like I'm in a little bit of a postpartum fog.
So I'm gonna say that , my thing for this week is going to be to let go of the need to control everything. Um, remember I told you I'm very type A, I love my plans, I love my schedules, my strategy, but, , in the last couple of weeks we've just been getting hit back to back with people being sick and it's just been a whole thing.
And I find myself like, kind of shaken a little bit , when I'm able to go according to the schedule. And so this week I'm just committed to girl. Don't worry about the schedule. It's okay. We're just going to take every moment as it comes. And I know that's gonna lead me to feeling a little bit more, , at peace and just like not overly stressed because I mean a stressed mama.
What is that gonna do for the family besides stress? Everybody out . Hundred percent. A hundred percent. We're gonna take it easy. .
Abbie: I love it. I love it. You definitely need that. And where can we find you? Are you promoting anything right now? What? What's the latest.
Kay: Yes. Okay. So the biggest thing is, , you can follow me on my podcast.
It's called the Becoming CEO podcast. It's perfect if you are a Christian entrepreneur, even if you're not a Christian, you are welcome over here, boo. Okay. We'd be having fun. , but it's a Christian podcast. We talk all things marketing, , sales and mindset of just building a business. And then also I have a YouTube channel that I'm trying to like be more committed to
That you can find it at Kay Hillman. And yeah, that's it. , I have an email newsletter that people love and, , I'm always sending out emails just like encouraging people and, sending like little love notes and stuff like that. So you can join over there. But yeah, that is where I'm at.
Oh, I'm also on Instagram at Mrs. Kay Hillman. So yeah, .
Abbie: Love it. We will link that all up in the show notes. So y'all just gotta scroll down. It's right there, right in front of you, and you can take your next first step to dive deeper. Oh, okay. Thank you so much for being on today. I appreciate you and your wisdom, and thank you so much for being.
A huge inspiration for me to grow into my faith, and you've really helped me gain more confidence to do an episode like this and, and lean in. So thank you so much. Well, thank
Kay: you for having me. And Abby, I just have to give you credit Boo, because you have just really been a light in my life and just so encouraging to me in these last couple of years that I've known you.
You have seen me through a whole other baby, and I don't think you realize just how much, like exposed me to Red Rock's Church and just different things that you've done, you probably don't even realize. I credit you with a lot of things in my faith, wow. I just, I love you so much and I'm just, I'm so glad that we were able to do this.
Oh, me too.
Abbie: I love you, Kay.
Kay: Love you boo.
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